Informed. Uplifting. Practical. Psychology that people can use.
Looking for a speaker who can inspire and connect without clichés or corporate fluff? Caroline Crotty is a psychotherapist and public speaker based in Cork, offering talks that blend professional expertise with warmth, humour and realism. Whether speaking in a boardroom, at a staff wellbeing day or on stage at a festival, Caroline delivers practical mental health and wellbeing strategies that people actually use.
Caroline speaks on a range of topics related to mental health, emotional wellbeing and everyday resilience. All talks are rooted in psychological insight, delivered in clear, plain language and tailored for real-life relevance.
Popular topics include:
Custom talks can be created for your team or event based on your themes or priorities.
Caroline regularly speaks at:
Caroline brings something different:
To book Caroline for a talk, workshop or panel, please get in touch below. You can also request a call to discuss your needs.
Based in Cork. Available for bookings across Ireland and online.
Our physical health and mental health are inextricably linked, with one impacting the other in a circular relationship. When feeling physically unwell, we might not feel very happy. When feeling anxious or overwhelmed, we might not feel physically well.
We can take measures to safeguard and boost our mental health. It can feel difficult and effortful, but the payoff is worth it. Prioritise your well-being to get the best out of your life.
Start Today!
Planning is fantastic, but starting today with something is far better than postponing until the time is just right! An imperfect something is better than a perfect nothing!
Exercise
Move for 20 minutes by marching on the spot, touching your elbows to the opposite knee, dance or follow an online class from the comfort of your home. If 20 minutes is too much, set a timer for 5 minutes, leave the house and as soon as the alarm goes off, turn around and come home – that’s a 10-minute walk and a wonderful starting point. 30 mins of moderate exercise most days can reduce stress, improve your mood, and boost self-esteem.
Screen-Free Time
Mobile phones are an intrinsic part of our lives. When prioritising mental health, schedule daily screen-free time. We do not benefit from being constantly distracted from ourselves. Spending time alone with our thoughts is beneficial. Our brains need downtime, ideally in nature, which can improve our focus. Even looking at and admiring trees is calming for humans because nature is therapeutic!
Social Connections
Just as important as spending time alone with our thoughts, forging social connections is beneficial for our mental health. It might be a little more difficult as we age to find new friends but reach out to others. Contact family members and friends, meet people, become involved in your community, join clubs/groups that interest you or volunteer.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness is not about having a full mind but is more about being present and engaged in the current moment. Mindfulness can help reduce stress and improve focus and feelings of wellbeing. Spend a few minutes every day, focusing on your breath and breathing. While walking, pay attention to your body and the sound of your steps on the ground. When someone speaks, listen and hear what they’re saying. There are several ways to develop mindfulness or join a yoga, or mindfulness class
Self-Care
Make a list of things that you enjoy doing or that you used to enjoy when you were younger. Prioritise doing something from that list (whatever you enjoy) as part of self-care practice even if only for ten minutes every day e.g. reading, walking, music, drawing, gardening. If you are a parent, by doing what you enjoy you teach your children the importance of self-care – you are their role model.
Seek Help
Ask your GP for a list of supports. Alternatively, phone 1800111888 anytime day or night and you’ll be sign-posted to Irish mental health support services.
Gratitude
Most of us never miss what we have until it’s gone, including people. Developing gratitude
can improve our mood, reduce stress, and increase positive feelings. Write three things
every day for which you are grateful, regardless of how small or insignificant. That keeps our focus on the positives regardless of how tough the day is.
In summary, move your body, have screen-free time, spend time in nature, forge social
connections, seek help, and practice gratitude and mindfulness. The benefits of prioritising your mental health outweigh the effort. Something done is better than a perfect nothing so why not do something to mind your mental health today!
www.carolinecrotty.ie
I’ve been thinking about how I ‘mind’ myself. There are a few things that I am consistent with such as allowing sufficient time for sleep, regularly drinking water, bringing fruit and nuts for snacking (which often stops me buying crisps or chocolate). Walking around the block in between appointments means I regularly stand up, move and leave the office even if only for short bursts. I wear clothes and footwear that are comfortable rather than ever looking dressy and I listen to loud music. I try to only have one morning coffee and I take a long evening walk.
But what is self-care? In my experience, it can include anything that benefits our wellbeing, that helps us feel good and keeps us healthy and resilient. Life has ups and downs and caring for ourselves in the okay times helps us to cope when not-so-okay times arrive.
Self-care is unique to each individual. What forms part of my self-care routine may not suit the next person. You might need quiet time away from people and I might need to be in the middle of chatty company. I may need to slow down while you might need to speed up!
After reading this, perhaps write a plan of action for your daily/weekly self-care routine. It’s not a to-do list it is an aspirational goals list. We might not get to do everything every day, but we can always do some. There is no bad feeling if we don’t do everything! Sometimes I eat crisps and chocolate and have two coffees or don’t get out for a long walk and that’s just the way life is!
We can divide our self-care routine into various different areas as follows:
Physical self-care
Move more. Hydrate. Have a bubbly bath. Light candles. Stretch. Sleep at night time, rest when necessary, eat nourishing foods keeping ultra-processed foods to a minimum. Care for your body. Slow down your breath.
Emotional self-care
Learn to say ‘no’. Be aware of emotions and reactions. Journal. Develop gratitude for the simple things in your day-to-day life. Identify emotional triggers. Be responsible for actions. Accept yourself. Challenge unhelpful thoughts and reactions.
Social self-care
Make time to connect. Build relationships with caring people. Ask for help when needed. Meet people to engage in activities outside of work/home. Meet real people in real time. Reduce screen time.
Spiritual self-care
Spend time alone. Connect with yourself and the universe. Whether or not you are religious, examine the values and beliefs that guide you.
Psychological self-care
Exercise mindfulness, acceptance, self-compassion, creativity. Fuel your mind (e.g. writing, movies, reading, puzzles). Cardio is a great brain protector! Mistakes are part of being human, learn how to let yourself off the hook! Watch your self-talk. Rid yourself of your mental ‘mind bully’. Solve problems that cause you worry or stress.
Environmental self-care
Spend time in nature. Live and work in an uncluttered, relaxing environment. Wear comfy, clean clothes. Recycle. Minimise waste. Enjoy your surroundings.
Financial self-care
Be conscious and responsible with finances. Prioritise debt (especially credit card). Be mindful about purchases and spending. Determine needs-vs-wants. Consciously spend and save.
Work self-care
Leave work at work. Log off and stay logged off until your next workday or shift begins. Value your time. Have clear boundaries with your work time. Have meetings outdoors whenever possible. Value your role. Say no and explain why. Enjoy doing your best. Take breaks away from your desk.
Please note: The above will not suit everyone. If you are living with a chronic health condition, walking fast for example may not be an option. These are simply some suggestions. Whenever you think of something you enjoy, that nurtures you, add that to your self-care list.
Choose whatever improves your mood and make that your priority – mind you – please!
What self-care practice can you incorporate into your day today?
www.carolinecrotty.ie
The Wheel of Life is a visual depiction of your satisfaction levels across important areas of your life and can help to visually demonstrate specific areas of life that require attention.
How? With a pen and paper, draw a large circle. This denotes your life! Divide the circle into 8 sections (like 8 pieces of pie). Firstly, divide the circle in half with a line through the centre, then, divide into quarters with another line and into eighths with two further lines. Each section denotes areas of your life.
Score every line evenly, from the centre to the outer edge from 1 – 10 with 1 being closest to the centre of the circle and 10 being the outer edge of the circle.
Label each section of the wheel with key areas of your life. Choose from the following list or use your own categories. My suggestions can be subdivided in your circle for example family and friends might be two separate sections:
Wheel of Life Categories
Health / Wellbeing; Family / Friends;
Significant Other / Partner / Dating / Relationship / Romance;
Work / Career / Parenting / Business;
Finance / Money;
Home / House / Physical Environment;
Social Life / Sports & Recreation / Fun / Play / Hobbies / Relaxation;
Self-development / Education / Learning / Personal Growth;
Contribution to Society / Volunteering / Community;
Wheel of Life Scores
Ask yourself how satisfied you are with each area of your life. Reflect on each category and score each out of 10. Then chart each of your scores on your wheel, drawing a line on each section for every score. The value 1 is closest to the centre of the circle and 10 is the edge of the circle.
Colour in each section from 0 to the score you allocated. A score of 10 means the entire piece of pie is coloured. A score of 5 means that the half, closest to the centre of the circle, is coloured.
Scores of 8,9,10 demonstrate satisfaction with that area of life. Scores of 1-4 show there is a distinct need for improvement and an opportunity for change.
Examine your Wheel Of Life. Is your wheel balanced? Is it wobbly? Which areas of your life need addressing? How can you increase scores in low-scoring sections? Set goals to make improvements. What would make a 10 score? What do you need to get started? What is the one thing that needs to happen to make your life more balanced? How can you set about making that happen? The purpose of this exercise is to see where our lives are balanced and the aspects/areas that need attention. Armed with this knowledge, what steps can you take to make your life more balanced for 2020?
www.carolinecrotty.ie
There is no need to shout at your children. We all know that shouting doesn’t work! But even when parents know it doesn’t work, the bizarre thing is that they continue to shout at their children and often claim “it’s the only way I can get my children to listen to me”.
Ask yourself whether you would tolerate someone shouting at your children? Is it acceptable?
What would you say if I shouted at your children? Why is it okay for you to shout at them?
I am not referring to shouting if there is a fire or to prevent a child from running onto the road for example. I am talking about shouting at your child to correct them. The “don’t talk to your brother like that” “stop fighting over the game” “don’t test my patience” type of shouting! I am also talking about shouting at your children because of stuff going on in your life. You’re frustrated, stressed out or anxious and something happens that tips you over the edge and you shout. Please don’t take your difficulties or issues out on your children.
It might interest you to note that parents who shout cause reactions in their children that are similar to them being physically punished.
Shouting is an expression of anger and has the potential to make a child feel scared. Shouting can increase behavioural problems in children and negatively impact their self-esteem.
If your shouting comes with a tirade of verbal putdowns, name-calling or insults because you have lost control, this constitutes emotional abuse which brings with it potential for anxiety and also for aggression in your children.
Stop shouting. Please. For your own sake as a parent but more importantly for your children and their emotional wellbeing.
I have heard arguments that “our parents shouted and it didn’t do us any harm” but we now know, from studies, that shouting has a negative impact on children’s development.
Remind yourself that you are your child’s role model. Model the behaviour that you expect from your child. Set clear boundaries for behaviour. You don’t shout because you don’t want your children to shout. Praise your child’s efforts. Give lots of hugs (at the right times).
Children who are most often in trouble for unaccepable behaviour are children who may be most in need of positive attention and affirmation and certainly in need of plenty hugs.
Start today. Explain that shouting is no longer tolerated in your family. That you were wrong to shout. That you will all stick to this new family rule. Show your children that you are in control of your emotions and that you (no longer) lose your cool. Explain that you are now going to step away from the area if you feel that you are getting frustrated / angry and think you might shout. Return to chat when you are more chilled.
You do not need to raise your voice to be heard. Go to where your children are, rather than shouting to them from another room. Meet them at their level rather than speaking down to them.
Teach children about emotions and feelings and discuss how you feel. For example, explain that you feel angry (at behaviour rather than at your child) and instead of shouting and screaming, demonstrate that you are in control of your emotions and can speak about the situation.
Always be respectful of your children. While you are practicing your new rule of no shouting, if you happen to raise your voice be very quick to apologise and explain why you were wrong and then start again.
You can do this!
If you need some help to manage your anger, please reach out.
www.carolinecrotty.ie
You might feel lonely that your youngest is starting school or it may seem like only yesterday when it was your child’s first day at school and now he/she’s leaving home to start a third level course.
For some parents, a child starting school is super exciting, while it can be heart-breaking for other parents. Feeling anxious about the start of school term is to be expected because it is a big change. Whatever is happening in your household right now, stay focused and remain relaxed!
It is normal for your child (regardless of age) to have worries and concerns about school. Fears can vary from “which teacher?”; “where will I sit?”; “what if the bus doesn’t stop?”; “what if my friends aren’t my friends anymore?”; “maybe I won’t fit in”; “what if I don’t know what to say”……the list goes on.
Helpful tips
Ensure you have some one-to-one time with each of your children every day and at least every week go for a walk or play some music together or take a spin in the car or chat while doing a chore together etc.
Chat with your child(ren). Your message is always “I’m here to listen” and “I am your ally” so your child(ren) can approach you with worries and will be assured that together you will devise a plan of action to tackle their fears head-on.
Listen to the small things so your child knows you will be there for the big things as they age and worries change.
Encourage your child to share their feelings with you or their other parent / responsible adult. Explain that changes associated with returning/starting school can be difficult, that worries are okay and that it is beneficial to talk about them.
When your child is anxious, it may be easy to become stressed. The more grounded you are the better. It is comforting for your child to see that you are relaxed about a situation particularly when your child is anxious about it. Your child is looking to you for comfort and reassurance, if you react it may send the wrong message to your child and they may panic even more.
When your child comes to you and says they are worried about something, please be careful not to dismiss their worries or undermine their fears. Do not say “don’t worry” or “everyone feels like that”. Instead, chat about what course of action your child can take to help alleviate the worry. Encourage your child to work through the anxiety and to problem-solve. Try to empathise by saying “I see that you’re worried about this”.
Don’t dismiss fears as silly or say “that’s nothing“. When your child comes to you stop whatever you’re doing and listen carefully – show that you are interested in finding a solution. Listening to your child means that you allow them time to speak and time to think about what they want to tell you – don’t jump in too fast or finish sentences! Take time, listen and reflect back what you hear so your child knows you are paying close attention and that what they tell you is important to you.
Don’t break your child’s confidence by discussing their worries behind their back and making fun of them – they won’t confide in you again if they discover that you’re not trustworthy!
Encourage your child to be solutions-focused “what helps you feel relaxed?” or “what can you do that might help you feel better?”
Encourage your child to think about the nice things that happened during the day to gear their attention away from anxious thoughts particularly at night time. A nice way to finish the day is to ask your child, when saying good night, “what’s the best thing that happened today?” or “what was your favourite part of today?”
Praise. Praise. Praise. Every time your child handles a tricky situation and manages their anxiety give plenty praise. Be encouraging. As a parent you can’t always fix everything or be around to offer constant reassurance, but you can give your child the confidence to believe in their own abilities to overcome worries and concerns.
Think about how you behave when you are tired and hungry – we as adults are easily irritated. Your child may be irritable because of hunger or tiredness. It is important to have a good back-to-school routine for sleep and for meals. Watch portion sizes. Don’t reward your child(ren) with food items, instead reward with a trip to the playground or a comic or art materials. Stick to your screen time schedule (i.e. set limits to the amount of time, no screens in the bedroom or at the meal table). So very many children head to bed but not to sleep and school work and concentration suffer as a result of being on line into the small hours.
To recap, chat with your child, stay grounded, be and encourage your child to be solutions-focused, encourage and praise and stick to the back-to-school routine for sleep, food and screen-time!
www.carolinecrotty.ie
People talk about “mental health” when they often mean “mental ill-health” or “mental-illness”. We all have ‘mental health’, just as we have ‘physical health’ and it changes throughout our life-time and even over the course of the day. Please care for, safeguard and protect your mental health because it is precious. The more you protect and look after it, the better able you will be to deal with life’s curveballs. Here are some reminders to help protect your mental health:
“Mind your body to mind your mind”. Eat well and regularly. Include natural foods. Increase intake of fruit, vegetables, wholegrains, nuts, beans and live yogurt. Include protein and fatty acids (oily fish, almonds, avocados etc). Avoid alcohol, trans fats, caffeine and high-sugar and processed foods. Cook your own meals. Stay hydrated with water.
Get your sleeping pattern in order. Ensure you get sufficient, good quality, uninterrupted sleep.
Exercise, movement, physical activity – we all know what we should be doing but there’s a big divide between knowledge and behaviour! Decide to move more and do it! Start small and build over time. Baby steps in the right direction are better than no steps! Celebrating those steps can help keep you motivated. Use the stairs, dance or go for a walk. I have a fridge magnet that says “housework won’t kill you but why take the risk” but one way to increase your movement is to do physical chores around the house like hoovering, dusting or cleaning windows. Being physically active helps you feel good and is great for your emotional wellbeing.
Set realistic goals – short, medium and long term. Acknowledge each achievement. Keep focused on the future – the best of life has yet to come.
Do things that you enjoy doing – gardening, painting, baking etc. Be creative when you can.
Give. This can be something small like holding open a door, saluting someone, making eye contact and smiling. Give your time by volunteering or give your energy by doing something nice for others – giving makes us feel good.
Always be kind. Kindness is the universal language. When we help others feel good we feel good.
Try to spot the good things in life and be grateful. Gratitude safeguards our mental health.
Spend time with people that are easy to be with.
Learn to say “no”.
Meet someone for a coffee or for a walk and a chat.
Join a club or start a club. We need social connections.
Stop being too busy to do the things you love and make the time.
Give yourself a break from technology and this includes the tv! Do something practical like read a book, bake, colour, draw, chat, get outside in nature, journal about your day, take a bubbly bath – there are so many things to do instead of being plonked in front of the tv.
Do something outside of your comfort zone, outside of your usual routine. When you feel discomfort in a safe environment/setting, remind yourself that it’s healthy and good.
Stop comparing.
Accept yourself as you are. You’re perfect. There is only one of you.
Be gentle with yourself when things go wrong. Praise you when things go right.
Learn how to relax and live with stress. Take up yoga or Tai-Chi, read a magazine, play with your children or a pet, listen to great music, sing out loud, write poetry, stand outdoors and admire the trees or the skyline.
Take time alone for yourself by yourself every day. I sit in my car when I return from work before I enter my house so that I leave work outside my home.
Smile. It brightens up those around you and also your face!
Learn how to control your breath. Breathe in slowly through your nose, hold for a couple of seconds, then exhale slowly through your mouth. Breathe into your tummy rather than into your upper chest. Do this for a couple of minutes a couple of times a day. We all have to take bathroom breaks so why not breathe slowly and deeply every time you’re in the bathroom or when you wash your hands or turn on the kettle. There are opportunities for calm breathine but you must be disciplined! You’re worth the effort!
Get help. If you need it, ask for it. No one needs to face a problem on their own. We are better when we work together.
Find someone with whom you can talk about your issues or difficulties. If that person is a professional such as a counsellor, doctor, psychotherapist, psychologist, you can rest assured that whatever you say will be kept confidential.
www.carolinecrotty.ie
In my experience, happiness has more to do with what goes on in our minds than our circumstances (it’s not what happens, it’s how we react that’s important).
Because the longest relationship you will ever have is with yourself, make it a happy one. Don’t think because someone has a huge house, is glamorous or prominent that they are happy! Happiness is different from success. Happiness comes from within and relates to what goes on in our brains rather than our bank accounts!
Happy people work at being happy. They make time to do things that help them feel good. Once you’ve decided you are going to make happiness a priority, sit down and set yourself achievable happiness goals:
Develop daily gratitude. We have much to be thankful for. If you want to be happy focus on what you have not on what you don’t have.
Movement is vital. Stretch before you get out of bed and stretch tense muscles. Walk around your home more often. Keep moving.
Comparisons never work. Stop comparing yourself to people you know or people on line.
Be solutions-focused. If you have a problem – ask yourself, “what can I do about this right now”? Also ask yourself what advice would you give someone else and then take your own advice.
Dance. In the kitchen or go out to dances. It’s easy exercise.
Take your time. Stop rushing. Admire the scenery. Daydream. Look at the clouds. Slowing everything down for a few minutes every day helps your overall sense of wellbeing.
Reduce the time you spend on technology. Be present for friends and family (never use your mobile in the presence of others).
Play to your strengths. Do things that make you feel happy. If you’re good at gardening, brilliant. Get out into the garden and plant veg or flowers or do some weeding. If you are not good at gardening, brilliant. Do something else that you are good at.
Allow the sun to bathe your skin. What sun you ask? Get outside every day and show your skin to the sun for 10 mins. Sunlight aids happiness (and sleep!)
Singing regulates our breathing and it is hard to take yourself too seriously while you are singing (and it doesn’t matter if you sound like a crow – just sing!)
Kindness is a universal language. When you are kind to others you feel happy but remember to be kind to you.
Feed your senses (sight, hearing, taste, smell and touch).
Breathe slowly in and out for a few minutes every day.
Act the eegit. Laugh. Play. Even when we have lots of responsibilities, make time for fun.
Hugs are healing. Hug someone or have a massage.
Do not cultivate negative thoughts, over-analyse, try to mind-read or predict the future.
Concentrate on the present– the only moment over which you have control!
&nb
Caroline Crotty Counselling & Psychotherapy Limited - 636306 - Suite 7, Block A, South Terrace Medical Centre, Infirmary Road, Cork T12 WF40
Copyright 2021 Caroline Crotty. All rights reserved. Website by 
