I am amused when someone asks, ‘Caroline, what are your plans for Christmas?” in September. We spend so long arranging Christmas, and it’s over in the blink of an eye! We look forward to the new year, our annual fresh start…yet months fly past so quickly, and here we are again at Christmas and New Year.
Christmas comes and goes. Take time to chill and relax despite the festive busyness. Amidst the clinking of glasses, vegetable peeling, cream whipping or the chorus of carols, find time to breathe deeply and ground yourself in the present moment. Take off your socks and walk on grass or sand and feel the sea on your feet. You can only be in the moment when the sea’s on your skin!
Christmas does not have to be centred around spending money. Embrace the joy of giving/receiving homemade gifts, knowing that the love infused in them outweighs shop-purchased products. Give something you’ve lovingly made, baked, or created, e.g., a card, cake, painting, or a Spotify playlist.
The list of homemade presents you can lovingly create and gift is endless. Send loving kindness and thoughts of health and vitality to people you haven’t seen in a while – post a card, email, or phone and arrange to reconnect (while you have the chance).
After Christmas, when the decorations and the house are cleared and your guests have departed, sit with the silence, and let gratitude fill the space where laughter and conversations recently lingered.
Make time to pause, rest, and reflect. Post-Christmas days allow the potential for personal insight. If you’re feeling sad or feeling lonely, it signifies the wonderful time you’ve had or post-holiday melancholy.Take comfort in knowing you’ve enjoyed yourself.
Take time to acknowledge 2023. Make space for introspection and prepare for what lies ahead in 2024. Journal about the learning and events of 2023, parts of which you’ll wish to bring into 2024, some of which perhaps you’d rather forget.
January is about taking baby steps in the right direction towards achieving your objectives. Make time for calm and reflection at the end of the year, and rather than resolutions, write your intentions for 2024. How do you hope to feel, or what would you like to achieve? It might be to play the ukulele, learn a language, or understand Quantum Physics. Write the plan for achieving your intentions and your mental, physical, and emotional wellness practices in 2024. Write about how you will feel when you achieve your dreams/goals/intentions.
Choose one habit you wish to cultivate and link it to an existing routine for better adherence. You might decide that relaxation will become part of your 2024 daily routine. Every time you enter the kitchen, inhale as slowly and deeply as you can through your nose. Hold that breath for a few seconds before exhaling slowly through your mouth – your new relaxation habit has officially begun!
This holiday season, may you find a balance between celebration and solitude, action and reflection.
Wishing you a season of serenity and a new year of living with intention.
www.carolinecrotty.ie
Do you know someone who is happy? Perhaps you are that happy person. What ‘happy’ means to me may differ to how you would define it. There are possibly as many definitions of ‘happiness’ as there are people.
Various factors impact and contribute to our overall sense of happiness from involvement in our communities to celebrations, weather, finances, family etc. I don’t have enough space here to examine influences on or definitions of happiness but in my experience, everyone wants to be happy.
Ask yourself ‘Do I want to be happy? If the answer is ‘yes’ put a plan of action into place. We all know that life is not fair but being happy requires an investment of your time and effort because happy people work at being happy.
If you want to be happy follow these tips:
Accept yourself completely – just as you are AND accept your reality. This means you accept your family, house, appearance, birthplace, strengths/limitations, history etc. Acceptance is the key to happiness. (This is not easy but it is vital).
Learn something new – how to put up a shelf, knit, sew, bake a sponge cake – keep your brain active with new knowledge and skills.
Forgive yourself for mistakes you have made. Forgive others for theirs. Let go of resentments – it is difficult to be happy with a heavy heart.
Engage in activities. Start a new hobby such as yoga or Bridge. Join a club or start one e.g. a book club or dinner club with your neighbours/friends.
Spend time with people that make you feel good, ideally positive people. Avoid people who stress you out or drain your energies.
Have a sense of purpose. Happy people have something to do or somewhere to go (even if it is just to the shop for milk).
Do things you are good at, that you enjoy, that are fun or make you feel good. Do them often.
Say NO. If you don’t want to do something don’t do it. If you do, then do so without complaint.
Acknowledge that you are not responsible for other people’s reactions, you are only responsible for yours.
Find your voice and say when you are unhappy about something. (Say I feel x when y because z)
Nurture a loving relationship with YOU. Happy people give themselves breaks and let themselves off the hook. They learn how to relax and how to manage anxieties/stresses.
Set short-term achievable goals. Don’t set yourself up for failure by setting unattainable goals! Set a goal, achieve it, acknowledge the achievement then set new goals!
Invest time in others. Make time for your partner, children, friends, neighbours or strangers.
Watch your language. I don’t mean swear words I mean self-talk. Say only positive things and use only positive words particularly when talking about you.
Help others because it makes us feel happy. Help willingly. Volunteer in your community or to do something nice for a neighbour.
Your brain believes you must be happy if you are smiling, it immediately raises your mood. Smiles are contagious.
Treat your body as well as you can. Eat well, hydrate, keep moving and breathe slowly.
Be kind and gentle, forgiving and compassionate with YOU and others.
www.carolinecrotty.ie
Caroline Crotty Counselling & Psychotherapy Limited - 636306 - Suite 7, Block A, South Terrace Medical Centre, Infirmary Road, Cork T12 WF40
Copyright 2021 Caroline Crotty. All rights reserved. Website by 
