When you’re in the thick of it – whether it’s heartbreak, burnout, grief, anxiety, or deep uncertainty about the state of the world and it’s leaders – it might feel like things will never improve, as though the weight of it all is here to stay. But it won’t last forever. However heavy everything feels, I’d like to remind you that whatever you’re facing right now is not the end of your story. Life might feel overwhelming. You might feel stuck. But feelings, like seasons, change. And even when you can’t see it yet, change is happening.
Psychological research and lived experience show that people are more resilient than they often realise. Even in the face of great pain, we have the capacity to heal, adapt and to grow. None of this happens overnight and certainly not perfectly but gradually, in small, quiet ways.
If you’re struggling today, please try not to judge your whole life by this current impasse or challenge. You might be in a moment of deep winter but spring always follows. Better days are not a fantasy – they are a biological and emotional truth for most people, given the right support, safety and time.
In the meantime, while you are waiting for the better days:
You are not failing. You are navigating. And the road ahead, though not easy now, can be lighter and more hopeful than today.
Please don’t give up.
Better days are ahead and that’s not just optimism, that’s a fact.
For support, tools, and gentle encouragement, visit www.carolinecrotty.ie or contact me here.
“Burnout” is a word we hear more and more often, but what does it actually mean?
Burnout is a psychological condition that involves feeling emotionally exhausted, cynical or disconnected from your job, and ineffective or as though you are not achieving anything.
Burnout develops when the pressures of work become too intense for too long. Over time, chronic stress can leave people feeling emotionally drained, detached, and doubtful of their own abilities. In 2019, the World Health Organisation formally recognised burnout as an ‘occupational phenomenon’ denoting that burnout results from unmanaged work stress and not from personal weakness.
A recent study by Dr Patrick Carr and Dr Shane Kelly (2023) highlights that medical doctors are particularly at risk. Long working hours, rising patient demands, administrative burden, emotional strain and insufficient time for rest and recovery all contribute. In Ireland, a survey during the pandemic found that 90% of doctors had experienced depression, anxiety, or stress linked to their work. Almost 70% were considered at high risk of burnout.
Although Carr & Kelly’s (2023) article focused on GPs and hospital doctors, burnout can affect anyone, in any profession or walk of life. Understanding burnout can help us all recognise it and respond early.
Many people who experience burnout describe it as ‘not feeling like themselves’ anymore. If you recognise these feelings, you are not alone.
Burnout often makes anger feel much closer to the surface. We can behave in ways that are not typical of us – we become impatient, irritable, quick to anger and not because we are bad people but because we are running on empty. When our emotional reserves are depleted, even small irritations can feel like major threats. We might even shout at our children and this is not typical of us (I’ve written about that here). Recognising these early signs in ourselves like our raised voice, or loss of patience, the feeling of being constantly ‘on edge’ – is crucial. These are warning signs – like our bodies waving red flags – telling us that we are no longer coping, that we are in need of rest, support and in need of change, not further endurance.
Becoming more human about burnout means allowing ourselves to notice these signals with honesty and compassion, rather than waiting until we completely fall apart. Recognising our own humanity and our limits is not weakness; it is wisdom.
Doctors carry an enormous emotional and professional burden. Delivering bad news, supporting anxious patients, facing illness and loss, and, managing ever-growing workloads is deeply demanding.
When doctors are burned out, it is not only their health that suffers, but patient care can be affected too. Burnout is linked to a higher risk of errors, lower quality care, and lower job satisfaction. Protecting the wellbeing of Irish medical doctors is essential for everyone.
Prioritise basic self-care: Eat, sleep and hydrate. These seem obvious, but are often the first things neglected when under pressure.
Set realistic boundaries: Perfection is not the goal. Doing your best is enough.
Ask for help: Support from colleagues, counselling, or professional services can make a positive difference.
Take real breaks: Short breaks during the day and longer holidays promote recovery.
Reconnect with meaning: Remember why you chose this work and reconnect with your purpose.
There is value in creating a culture of support at work, where teamwork, open conversations, and peer mentoring are encouraged.
As mentioned, burnout is a natural response to prolonged, unmanaged stress. None of us is impervious – anyone can experience burnout.
Feeling worn down, overwhelmed, or disconnected does not mean you are weak – it means you are human. Taking care of yourself is not selfish. It is essential for you and for those you serve, whether as a doctor, healthcare provider, in your team at work, or your family.
Burnout is not a medical condition, but a workplace issue. Solving it requires organisational changes and not simply encouraging individual doctors to become more resilient.
“Burnout is like the canary in the coal mine. It is a warning sign of a toxic environment. The solution is to fix the environment, not to toughen up the canary” Dr Christina Maslach
In other words, healthcare leaders and policymakers must address the root causes of burnout; otherwise doctors may leave Ireland for better working conditions abroad.
Carr, P., & Kelly, S. (2023). Burnout in Doctors Practising in Ireland Post Covid-19. Irish medical journal, 116(4), 761.
Maslach C. (2019) Understanding Job Burnout. Youtube: IT Revolution.
As a psychotherapist, I often sit with people who feel torn between what they want and what others expect of them, between what they feel and what they think they “should” feel. Invisible rules, self-doubt, guilt or fear often burden them, yet underneath it all, there is usually a quiet question whispering: “Can I live my life as myself?”
Yes you can! And more than that, you deserve to. We spend so much time figuring out what we ought to do – the right thing, the thing other people want us to do – feeling like we ‘should’ do this or ‘have to’ do that. At the end of the day, it’s our life, our choices and our consequences.
There is no dress rehearsal. No draft version. This is your one and only precious life. The more you try to shape yourself into someone who pleases everyone else at the expense of your wellbeing or what you want for yourself, the further you drift from being your true self. That disconnection from your values, needs and desires is often where anxiety, low mood and feeling very flat develop.
We are shaped by the families and cultures in which we grow up. We internalise what is “allowed, ” ” appropriate, ” ” successful,” or “encouraged” from a very early age. But part of being an adult and healing ourselves involves questioning our internalised messages.
Being yourself is not easy. Sometimes it means saying no when others expect yes. Sometimes it means risking disapproval from people very close to you. It might mean that you’re stepping away from relationships or roles that no longer fit. Choosing yourself, your wellbeing, your authenticity, your peace is not selfish – it is self-respect and self-love.
The courage to be yourself is not always loud or defiant. It is often quiet. It is the decision to rest when you feel guilty for slowing down. It is the moment you say “Actually, this doesn’t work for me anymore.” It is doing something different even when nobody notices but you’re prioritising what you need for you.
Therapy is not about fixing what is broken. It is about exploring who you are beneath the noise and giving yourself permission to be. In therapy we look at the stories you have been told about who you are supposed to be. We examine the weight you are carrying and ask if it is really yours to continue to hold. Little by little we can build the confidence, boundaries and clarity which allow you to live more freely and fully – and to be you, yourself.
You do not owe anyone an explanation for doing what is right for you. Whether it is how you dress, who you love, the job you choose or the way you spend your free time – it is enough that it matters to you. We are not here to be palatable, to perform or to shrink. We are here to be real. Whole. Human.
If you are feeling the pull to change something, to reclaim something, to finally let yourself be who you are – why not follow it? You do not need permission
The life you want is not selfish or silly. It is sacred. It is yours.
Caroline Crotty – Psychotherapist
www.carolinecrotty.ie
hello@carolinecrotty.ie
Informed. Uplifting. Practical. Psychology that people can use.
Looking for a speaker who can inspire and connect without clichés or corporate fluff? Caroline Crotty is a psychotherapist and public speaker based in Cork, offering talks that blend professional expertise with warmth, humour and realism. Whether speaking in a boardroom, at a staff wellbeing day or on stage at a festival, Caroline delivers practical mental health and wellbeing strategies that people actually use.
Caroline speaks on a range of topics related to mental health, emotional wellbeing and everyday resilience. All talks are rooted in psychological insight, delivered in clear, plain language and tailored for real-life relevance.
Popular topics include:
Custom talks can be created for your team or event based on your themes or priorities.
Caroline regularly speaks at:
Caroline brings something different:
To book Caroline for a talk, workshop or panel, please get in touch below. You can also request a call to discuss your needs.
Based in Cork. Available for bookings across Ireland and online.
In the fast pace of modern life, many of us have become experts at coping, managing and pushing through. Everything may appear “fine” on the outside, but inside, it’s a different story: sleepless nights, a sense of overwhelm, decision fatigue and feeling like you’re constantly “on.”
Whether you’re a busy professional, a business owner or someone navigating a particularly difficult chapter, there’s no need to carry it all alone.
Therapy offers a calm, confidential space where you can offload the mental load and finally exhale.
Why People Choose Therapy
The people who reach out to me are often capable, high-functioning adults who are used to managing on their own. They are not “broken” or “in crisis.” They are simply tired — mentally, emotionally and physically — from holding too much for too long.
Common reasons people contact me include:
Ongoing anxiety or overthinking that affects sleep and relationships
Emotional burnout and chronic mental exhaustion
Managing a high-pressure role with little time to reflect
A desire for a neutral, professional space to talk without judgement or unsolicited advice
Working through past experiences that continue to shape present-day life
What I Offer
I provide private psychotherapy for adults in Cork city and online. My approach is warm, grounded and practical. I work particularly well with those who need:
A trusted sounding board, not just advice, but someone who will genuinely listen
Support with stress, anxiety or emotional overwhelm
A consistent, confidential space to think clearly and make sense of things
A way to explore what’s next, personally, professionally or both
I also offer professional supervision for solicitors, barristers and legal professionals managing the emotional toll of heavy caseloads and vicarious trauma.
In-Person and Online Appointments
My therapy practice is based in Cork city centre. I also offer online sessions via Zoom for those who prefer the convenience of attending from home or work. Therapy should fit into your life, not add stress to it.
You Don’t Have to Be in Crisis to Come to Therapy
Therapy is not only for when things fall apart. It can be a powerful tool for maintaining wellbeing, building resilience and staying mentally sharp in demanding environments.
Investing in your emotional health is not a luxury. It is a necessity.
Ready to Talk?
If you’re ready for a space to talk, think and breathe, and begin to feel more like yourself again, I’d be happy to speak with you.
Sessions are private, professional and tailored to your needs.
In-person in Cork city
Online via Zoom
Daytime and evening appointments available
Send a text to +353877107032
or hello@carolinecrotty.ie
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is a structured, evidence-based psychological treatment that has been shown to help with a wide range of difficulties, including depression, anxiety, stress, low self-esteem and relationship challenges.
Originally developed in the 1960s by psychiatrist Dr Aaron T. Beck, CBT supports people in building practical skills to manage distressing thoughts, behaviours and emotions. Rather than focusing on short-term relief alone, CBT promotes long-term improvements in wellbeing. Over the years, contributions from clinicians such as Dr Judith Beck have helped refine and expand the approach globally.
At the heart of CBT is the understanding that our thoughts, emotions, physical sensations and behaviours are interconnected. By identifying and changing unhelpful patterns, people can experience meaningful and lasting improvements in mental health and overall quality of life.
CBT can support a wide range of everyday difficulties, including:
Low mood or lack of motivation
You might feel flat, stuck or just not like yourself. CBT helps you notice unhelpful thinking patterns and gently shift them, while reconnecting with things that bring energy and meaning.
Overthinking and worry
If your mind feels constantly busy or you’re always anticipating the worst, CBT offers tools to calm that mental noise and reduce overwhelm.
Stress and burnout
Whether it’s work, family or life in general, CBT helps build healthier coping strategies, establish boundaries and restore a sense of control.
Confidence and self-esteem
If you’re your own worst critic, CBT can help you challenge harsh self-judgements and build a more compassionate, balanced self-view.
Relationship or communication difficulties
CBT can support you in recognising patterns, managing emotional triggers, and communicating more clearly in your personal or professional life.
General anxiety or unease
Sometimes anxiety appears without a clear cause. CBT offers tools to manage physical symptoms and develop a greater sense of calm and stability.
CBT is always tailored to an individual’s specific needs and goals. Treatment typically lasts between 6 and 26 sessions, depending on the nature and severity of the issue. Sessions are structured, collaborative and goal-focused, with regular progress reviews. A key aim is to equip you with lifelong tools to manage your thoughts, emotions and behaviours beyond therapy.
While Cognitive Behavioural Therapy forms a strong foundation of my approach, I am not a strict CBT therapist. I also integrate elements of talking therapy to offer a warm, relational space that suits each person’s unique needs and preferences.
As of January 2025, I offer both in-person and online CBT sessions. Each 50-minute appointment is €80.00
If you’re feeling anxious, overwhelmed or stuck in low mood, CBT offers evidence-based support and practical tools to help you regain your balance. Taking that first step can feel daunting but it’s often the most important one toward building a more fulfilling life.
If you’d like to book an initial consultation or ask a question, please feel free to get in touch. I offer counselling and psychotherapy in Cork city and online and I’d be happy to hear from you.
Contact Caroline:Contact Caroline: hello@carolinecrotty.ie
Visit: www.carolinecrotty.ie
Have you ever left a therapy session feeling worse than when you started? If so, you’re not alone, which doesn’t mean therapy isn’t working. This post explores why that might happen, what it means, and how to support yourself.
Therapy is often seen as a path to healing, growth and emotional wellbeing. But it’s not uncommon to feel worse before feeling better. Recently, a young man shared after our session that he expected to feel better but instead he actually felt worse. His experience inspired this blog – to explore why that can happen and to offer guidance for anyone feeling the same. I understand how disheartening it can be to leave a therapy session with heavy emotions still lingering and I hope to explain why it might happen.
Therapy often involves exploring issues that have been buried for years. When emotions like grief, trauma or anger are brought to the surface, that can feel overwhelming. This emotional release is part of the healing process but it’s natural to feel discomfort as you begin to work through it.
Talk therapy helps identify and gently challenge unhelpful thought patterns. Questioning beliefs that may have provided comfort or structure can feel destabilising. Letting go of familiar but limiting ways of thinking is a bit like learning a new instrument or changing your golf swing unfamiliar at first, but ultimately beneficial (or liberating).
Therapy often brings clarity about relationships, behaviours or past experiences and that can sometimes feel painful. Recognising patterns that no longer serve you or facing truths you may have avoided can feel like waking a sleeping bear. Difficult, yes but necessary for meaningful change.
Many therapeutic approaches include between-session practices such as journaling, reflection or trying new behaviours. This can take emotional energy and mental space, which might feel exhausting especially when already managing a full and busy life.
Sometimes, bringing difficult feelings into awareness may cause a short-term increase in sadness, anxiety or physical tension. These responses are part of emotional processing and often signal that important inner work is taking place – that change is happening.
Therapy doesn’t provide instant answers. Frustration or disappointment can arise when change feels slower than expected. In a fast-paced world, it’s easy to hope for a quick fix, but therapy is about depth and that takes time.
We all use defence mechanisms like denial, distraction or intellectualising to protect ourselves from emotional pain. Therapy can gently challenge these. When that happens, it may feel uncomfortable or even distressing, but working through these blockages is essential for healing and growth.
Be honest about how you’re feeling. Just like that young man mentioned how he was feeling to me – talk to your therapist who will want to understand your experience and can help you make sense of it. Sometimes people smile or laugh during sessions, even when discussing painful topics, using humour as a form of protection. But unless you say how you’re really feeling, your therapist might not know.
Growth and change take time. Feeling unsettled does not mean you’re doing something wrong. Be gentle with yourself and acknowledge the effort you’re making. The work you’re doing matters.
Therapy is rarely a straight path or linear. Celebrate small steps forward and know that setbacks are part of the process. Difficult conversations might need to be revisited more than once and that’s okay.
Talk to trusted friends or confidential family members. Support outside of therapy appointments can help you to feel steadier and also remind you that you’re not going through this alone.
Take care of yourself in ways that feel nourishing and nurturing. Whether that’s going for a walk, listening to music, making a favourite meal or doing something creative – give yourself permission to slow down and regroup.
If you regularly leave counselling or psychotherapy sessions feeling worse and see no progress over time, it may be worth reflecting on whether the current therapeutic approach or therapist is the right fit. A conversation with your therapist can also help clarify this.
If you feel overwhelmed between sessions, don’t wait in silence. Reach out to a trusted GP, crisis line or mental health professional. You are not alone and help is always available.
Feeling worse after therapy doesn’t mean you’re failing – it often means something important is shifting. Therapy asks you to be brave and honest which can stir up strong feelings. By naming those feelings, leaning into support and trusting the process, you’re laying the groundwork for lasting change.
Every step counts. Even when it’s hard, you’re moving forward. Be proud of yourself and be kind to yourself.
Have you experienced mixed feelings during therapy? I’d love to hear how you felt after a session or what surprised you most. I’m very grateful to the young man who inspired this post by sharing his disappointment at feeling sad/flat/low after opening up.
If you’d like to explore therapy or learn more, please feel free to contact me.
Caroline Crotty – Psychotherapist
www.carolinecrotty.ie
hello@carolinecrotty.ie
I’ve been thinking about how I ‘mind’ myself. There are a few things that I am consistent with such as allowing sufficient time for sleep, regularly drinking water, bringing fruit and nuts for snacking (which often stops me buying crisps or chocolate). Walking around the block in between appointments means I regularly stand up, move and leave the office even if only for short bursts. I wear clothes and footwear that are comfortable rather than ever looking dressy and I listen to loud music that I love. I try to only have one morning coffee and I take a long evening walk.
But what is self-care? In my experience, it can include anything that benefits our wellbeing, that helps us feel good and keeps us healthy and resilient. Life has ups and downs and caring for ourselves in the okay times helps us to cope when not-so-okay times arrive.
Self-care is unique to each individual. What forms part of my self-care routine may not suit the next person. You might need quiet time away from people and I might need to be in the middle of chatty company. I may need to slow down while you might need to speed up!
After reading this, perhaps write a plan of action for your daily/weekly self-care routine. It’s not a to-do list it is an aspirational goals list. We might not get to do everything every day, but we can always do some. There is no bad feeling if we don’t do everything! Sometimes I eat crisps and chocolate and have two coffees or don’t get out for a long walk and that’s just the way life is!
We can divide our self-care routine into various different areas as follows:
Move more. Hydrate. Have a bubbly bath. Light candles. Stretch. Sleep at night time, rest when necessary, eat nourishing foods keeping ultra-processed foods to a minimum. Care for your body. Slow down your breath.
Learn to say ‘no’. Be aware of emotions and reactions. Journal. Develop gratitude for the simple things in your day-to-day life. Identify emotional triggers. Be responsible for actions. Accept yourself. Challenge unhelpful thoughts and reactions.
Make time to connect. Build relationships with caring people. Ask for help when needed. Meet people to engage in activities outside of work/home. Meet real people in real time. Reduce screen time.
Spend time alone. Connect with yourself and the universe. Whether or not you are religious, examine the values and beliefs that guide you.
Exercise mindfulness, acceptance, self-compassion, creativity. Fuel your mind (e.g. writing, movies, reading, puzzles). Cardio is a great brain protector! Mistakes are part of being human, learn how to let yourself off the hook! Watch your self-talk. Rid yourself of your mental ‘mind bully’. Solve problems that cause you worry or stress.
Spend time in nature. Live and work in an uncluttered, relaxing environment. Wear comfy, clean clothes. Recycle. Minimise waste. Enjoy your surroundings.
Be conscious and responsible with finances. Prioritise debt (especially credit card). Be mindful about purchases and spending. Determine needs-vs-wants. Consciously spend and save.
Leave work at work. Log off and stay logged off until your next workday or shift begins. Value your time. Have clear boundaries with your work time. Have meetings outdoors whenever possible. Value your role. Say no and explain why. Enjoy doing your best. Take breaks away from your desk.
Please note: The above will not suit everyone. If you are living with a chronic health condition, walking fast for example may not be an option. These are simply some suggestions. Whenever you think of something you enjoy, that nurtures you, add that to your self-care list.
Self-care looks different for everyone, and having the right supports can make it easier to maintain good habits and wellbeing. Caroline Crotty is a counsellor and psychotherapist based in Cork city. In addition to her clinical work, Caroline delivers talks, workshops, and corporate wellbeing programmes that focus on self-care, stress management and emotional wellbeing. She works with individuals, schools and companies to promote mental health and resilience. If you would like to organise a talk or wellbeing training for your group or workplace, get in contact here.
Choose whatever improves your mood and make that your priority – mind you – please!
What self-care practice can you incorporate into your day today?
www.carolinecrotty.ie
People talk about “mental health” when they often mean “mental ill-health” or “mental-illness”. We all have ‘mental health’, just as we have ‘physical health’ and it changes throughout our life-time and even over the course of the day. Please care for, safeguard and protect your mental health because it is precious. The more you protect and look after it, the better able you will be to deal with life’s curveballs. Here are some reminders to help protect your mental health:
“Mind your body to mind your mind”. Eat well and regularly. Include natural foods. Increase intake of fruit, vegetables, wholegrains, nuts, beans and live yogurt. Include protein and fatty acids (oily fish, almonds, avocados etc). Avoid alcohol, trans fats, caffeine and high-sugar and processed foods. Cook your own meals. Stay hydrated with water.
Get your sleeping pattern in order. Ensure you get sufficient, good quality, uninterrupted sleep.
Exercise, movement, physical activity – we all know what we should be doing but there’s a big divide between knowledge and behaviour! Decide to move more and do it! Start small and build over time. Baby steps in the right direction are better than no steps! Celebrating those steps can help keep you motivated. Use the stairs, dance or go for a walk. I have a fridge magnet that says “housework won’t kill you but why take the risk” but one way to increase your movement is to do physical chores around the house like hoovering, dusting or cleaning windows. Being physically active helps you feel good and is great for your emotional wellbeing.
Set realistic goals – short, medium and long term. Acknowledge each achievement. Keep focused on the future – the best of life has yet to come.
Do things that you enjoy doing – gardening, painting, baking etc. Be creative when you can.
Give. This can be something small like holding open a door, saluting someone, making eye contact and smiling. Give your time by volunteering or give your energy by doing something nice for others – giving makes us feel good.
Always be kind. Kindness is the universal language. When we help others feel good we feel good.
Try to spot the good things in life and be grateful. Gratitude safeguards our mental health.
Spend time with people that are easy to be with.
Learn to say “no”.
Meet someone for a coffee or for a walk and a chat.
Join a club or start a club. We need social connections.
Stop being too busy to do the things you love and make the time.
Give yourself a break from technology and this includes the tv! Do something practical like read a book, bake, colour, draw, chat, get outside in nature, journal about your day, take a bubbly bath – there are so many things to do instead of being plonked in front of the tv.
Do something outside of your comfort zone, outside of your usual routine. When you feel discomfort in a safe environment/setting, remind yourself that it’s healthy and good.
Stop comparing.
Accept yourself as you are. You’re perfect. There is only one of you.
Be gentle with yourself when things go wrong. Praise you when things go right.
Learn how to relax and live with stress. Take up yoga or Tai-Chi, read a magazine, play with your children or a pet, listen to great music, sing out loud, write poetry, stand outdoors and admire the trees or the skyline.
Take time alone for yourself by yourself every day. I sit in my car when I return from work before I enter my house so that I leave work outside my home.
Smile. It brightens up those around you and also your face!
Learn how to control your breath. Breathe in slowly through your nose, hold for a couple of seconds, then exhale slowly through your mouth. Breathe into your tummy rather than into your upper chest. Do this for a couple of minutes a couple of times a day. We all have to take bathroom breaks so why not breathe slowly and deeply every time you’re in the bathroom or when you wash your hands or turn on the kettle. There are opportunities for calm breathine but you must be disciplined! You’re worth the effort!
Get help. If you need it, ask for it. No one needs to face a problem on their own. We are better when we work together.
Find someone with whom you can talk about your issues or difficulties. If that person is a professional such as a counsellor, doctor, psychotherapist, psychologist, you can rest assured that whatever you say will be kept confidential.
www.carolinecrotty.ie
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