Our physical health and mental health are inextricably linked, with one impacting the other in a circular relationship. When feeling physically unwell, we might not feel very happy. When feeling anxious or overwhelmed, we might not feel physically well.
We can take measures to safeguard and boost our mental health. It can feel difficult and effortful, but the payoff is worth it. Prioritise your well-being to get the best out of your life.
Start Today!
Planning is fantastic, but starting today with something is far better than postponing until the time is just right! An imperfect something is better than a perfect nothing!
Exercise
Move for 20 minutes by marching on the spot, touching your elbows to the opposite knee, dance or follow an online class from the comfort of your home. If 20 minutes is too much, set a timer for 5 minutes, leave the house and as soon as the alarm goes off, turn around and come home – that’s a 10-minute walk and a wonderful starting point. 30 mins of moderate exercise most days can reduce stress, improve your mood, and boost self-esteem.
Screen-Free Time
Mobile phones are an intrinsic part of our lives. When prioritising mental health, schedule daily screen-free time. We do not benefit from being constantly distracted from ourselves. Spending time alone with our thoughts is beneficial. Our brains need downtime, ideally in nature, which can improve our focus. Even looking at and admiring trees is calming for humans because nature is therapeutic!
Social Connections
Just as important as spending time alone with our thoughts, forging social connections is beneficial for our mental health. It might be a little more difficult as we age to find new friends but reach out to others. Contact family members and friends, meet people, become involved in your community, join clubs/groups that interest you or volunteer.
Mindfulness
Mindfulness is not about having a full mind but is more about being present and engaged in the current moment. Mindfulness can help reduce stress and improve focus and feelings of wellbeing. Spend a few minutes every day, focusing on your breath and breathing. While walking, pay attention to your body and the sound of your steps on the ground. When someone speaks, listen and hear what they’re saying. There are several ways to develop mindfulness or join a yoga, or mindfulness class
Self-Care
Make a list of things that you enjoy doing or that you used to enjoy when you were younger. Prioritise doing something from that list (whatever you enjoy) as part of self-care practice even if only for ten minutes every day e.g. reading, walking, music, drawing, gardening. If you are a parent, by doing what you enjoy you teach your children the importance of self-care – you are their role model.
Seek Help
Ask your GP for a list of supports. Alternatively, phone 1800111888 anytime day or night and you’ll be sign-posted to Irish mental health support services.
Gratitude
Most of us never miss what we have until it’s gone, including people. Developing gratitude
can improve our mood, reduce stress, and increase positive feelings. Write three things
every day for which you are grateful, regardless of how small or insignificant. That keeps our focus on the positives regardless of how tough the day is.
In summary, move your body, have screen-free time, spend time in nature, forge social
connections, seek help, and practice gratitude and mindfulness. The benefits of prioritising your mental health outweigh the effort. Something done is better than a perfect nothing so why not do something to mind your mental health today!
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I find it fascinating that Halloween originated in Ireland. Ancient Celts celebrated the festival of Samhain when it was believed that the souls of the dead returned to Earth. Druids lit sacred bonfires, wild costumes were worn, and the Celtic deities were appeased with offerings. It was a festival of great fortune-telling and I’d bet there wasn’t a pumpkin in sight!
Perhaps you might select a local event this month, head out, and get involved. Connection is a vital element of feeling good about ourselves. Conversely, loneliness can have a profoundly negative impact on our health and well-being. Try to connect with others and embrace the fun aspect of October.
“The time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.” (Jim Goodwin / Sydney J. Harris)
At work, I often ask, ‘how do you relax?’. People respond that they watch television, lie on the sofa or have a glass of wine. Whilst these activities are pleasant, they’re not relaxation skills. When we are healthy, we rarely pay attention to our breathing. However, controlling the pace of our breath is itself a relaxation skill. When we master breath control, we are better equipped to manage our worried or stressed reactions.
Humans encounter stressful situations. We cannot control the future or prevent unpleasant events, but we can learn how to relax our bodies and minds with diaphragmatic breathing. Because we differ, we relax in different ways. We owe it to ourselves to discover which relaxation skills best suit us as individuals, then practice and hone our favourite skills.
Diaphragmatic breathing can help improve focus and is used by singers, divers, and athletes
to improve lung capacity. Breathing too quickly can make us feel dizzy or even a little anxious. Taking slow, regular breaths can help us control worried or stressed thoughts and anxious feelings, and help us feel more relaxed and in control.
To control your breathing, place one hand on your chest and the other on your tummy. Inhale slowly through your nose, and imagine your breath is filling your abdomen like a balloon. The hand on your tummy moves. Some pause for a couple of seconds before breathing out slowly (I exhale through my mouth). The hand on your tummy moves as you exhale. The hand on your chest remains still. (This is where practice is required). Repeat this ten times twice per day. You don’t need to use your hands once you master diaphragmatic breathing. You can use this relaxation skill anywhere, anytime.
You’re breathing into your lungs while consciously engaging your diaphragm, focusing on your breath while reducing physical symptoms of anxiety.
This Halloween, enjoy doing something different, eating barmbrack, playing snap apple or apple bobbing, going trick or treating and practising your diaphragmatic breathing!
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Anyone who regularly reads anything I write knows that I recommend learning how to control our breath and breathing! I even go so far as to suggest that when you learn that skill, it is life-changing.
Our typical, everyday breathing takes place without us ever having to pay attention to it, it happens automatically rather like our heart beating or our pupil size changing. Breathing might be something we do not pay attention to or think about. However, it is possible to bring our conscious attention or focus to our breath and to slow it down. This in turn, positively impacts our heart rate.
Diaphragmatic breathing is something we hear about but might not fully understand. A diaphragm (pronounced dye-ah-fram) is the dome-shaped muscle involved in breathing and other bodily processes (from posture to vomiting)! Several nerves pass through the diaphragm so what happens with our diaphragm can be experienced elsewhere including in our brains.
We know our breathing is affected by our thoughts, emotions, behaviours and by stress. When we are stressed or get a fright, our breathing changes and our pupils dilate. Our bodies react to the stressor, our neurons are activated and our bodies react. That fight / flight response is left-over from our predecessors when predators were a reality. Predators are not a concern for us now! Whether it is getting an injection or giving a presentation or there’s an approaching tiger – our neurons fire in the same way as they did for our hunter-gatherer ancestors sending a plethora of chemicals and hormones into our system.
Nowadays, to cope when stressed, we might be tempted to eat high carbohydrate foods or consume food in general but this is not the most appropriate solution – having something that we could do in the moment is a more helpful stress-reducing tool!
BREATHING! Breathing is the way forward – it’s a stress-busting technique that we can do any time, anywhere and no one needs to know we are doing it!
Andrew Huberman, Neurobiologist at Stanford University is working to try to figure out breathing patterns and stress. He and his team of researchers examined the benefits of what they refer to as physiological sighs.
Remember when you were young and cried so hard that you did a double-intake of breath in the aftermath of the crying (or maybe even while crying)? That’s a stress relieving technique and we didn’t even know! Dogs often do it when sleeping – take a double-intake of breath. Huberman found that breathing in a double-inhale through the nose, followed by an extended exhale through the mouth has an active part to play in our stress response. This is something we can do – at any time.
The science behind this physiological sigh is the double inhale through the nose allowing oxygen in, causes alveoli within our lungs to open, in turn allowing us to offload extra carbon dioxide in our long exhaled sigh out.
Any time you get to inhale and exhale slowly with focus you are doing yourself a favour! When you are feeling stressed, do this (double inhale and slow exhale) once or twice and it will help you feel calm despite whatever is going on.
Remember – you are wonderful!
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Information Overload isn’t new. It has more recently changed so that now, rather than have too many books to read, we have technology demanding our attention. We too are demanding of attention or potentially vying for the attention of others on social media. We are slowly learning that too much screen time may affect our attention span. Learning To Pay Attention to ourselves is beneficial and using a breathing meditation is time spent caring for you i.e. self-care.
Self-care is not self-indulgent, it is vital. Depending on our age, we may not have been taught about self-care in school but as adults, we independently learn that in order to give our best we must care and look after our bodies and minds.
A short breathing meditation can help us relax, gain focus and manage our worries or stressful thoughts.
I am not a mindfulness teacher neither am I am meditation master. My training is in counselling and psychotherapy. However, in my experience, when we learn how to focus our minds on something other than worry or bothersome thoughts, our attention can be a remarkably useful tool.
We can’t stop thoughts or worries from popping into our minds but what do we do with them once there? We can allow any thoughts to be present, while we learn how to bring our attention to our breath.
Using a meditation exercise can help us to be present in the here and now and not back in the past or flying off into the future, not caught up in our imagination. This is not about controling our thoughts or getting rid of them.
Mindfulness involves practicing bringing our attention back to the present, to the here and now – whenever it wanders off.
As an analogy, attention is like a muscle. If we don’t regularly use the muscle, it can become weaker. However, with regular exercise we can strengthen and build it.
Meditation exercises, like learning any new skill, require practice. Here’s one that takes only three minutes initially which, in time, can be increased to ten mins twice per day. In my experience, allowing ourselves even a couple of minutes every day to mindfully breathe is beneficial and relaxing.
Sit in a chair and get yourself comfy. Pay attention to your body and ask yourself, “what do I feel right now? What are my feelings? And what are my thoughts?” Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings and to all the sensations in your body. Describe these experiences to yourself. Don’t judge or alter anything. Accept. Spend up to one minute doing this.
Bring your focus of awareness to your breath. Focus on the sensations of your breath as it enters and leaves your tummy. Bring your awareness to the sensations of movement in your tummy and allow your thoughts to go, to leave you as you breathe. Breathe in as you say ‘relax’ and on each exhalation say “calm”. If your mind wanders, do not try to change the thoughts or make them leave. Acknowledge their presence, allow them to be there, then allow them to go, returning your attention and focus to your breath and breathing. Spend up to two minutes doing this.
Extend your awareness to sensing your whole body breathing. Become aware of sensations throughout your body. If your mind wanders to various thoughts or feelings, acknowledge them and let them go and return your focus to sen1sing your whole body breathing. Spend about two mins doing this.
As you become more familiar with this skill of “letting go”, wherein you choose to notice but let go of thoughts, emotions or sensations, this is the ideal time to increase the time. Acknowledge and appreciate what you are doing, allowing yourself time to settle your mind, to breathe, to pay attention to you.
Attention is like a muscle and with regular exercise, a muscle works really well! Breathing meditation is the same – the more often you allow yourself time to do it, the easier it gets as the more skilled you become!
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Our world has become busier than ever, full of busy people with busy lives and whilst technology has been an amazing advancement for humanity it also is a scourge in that we are constantly contactable and there is always some noise coming from some screen nearby! It’s hard to hear our own thoughts at times. How can we relax or know what we are thinking unless we have silence to pay attention and listen to our thoughts?
I often talk about relaxation and explain that relaxation is not lying on the sofa in front of the tv with a glass of wine – sorry! Relaxation is really helped by spending time alone, with our thoughts, in silence.
ALONE IN SILENCE beause silence is golden.
We live in a world where any time spent alone is usually filled with noise and distractions. When we go for a walk or a drive, we invariably listen to music or to the latest podcast. We sit at home and have the radio, tv or some screen at hand.
Spending time in silence is something I encourage because it can reduce tension in both brain and body in mere minutes.
Silence is healthy and can boost the body’s immune system, decrease stress, encourage brain cell growth, reduce blood pressure and improve sleep. And that’s not all!
Time in silence, alone with our thoughts allows our brains an opportunity to examine our thoughts rather than constantly distracting ourselves from them. When we are in silence, we often day dream or run through events. This allows for an opportunity to become more creative and to self-reflect.
We can easily create opportunities to be in silence and only a few minutes every day is beneficial. For example, sitting in silence in our car or going for a walk outside in nature without any device (i.e. no mobile phone or screen).
Nature is therapeutic and that, coupled with being alone, can be very healthy.
Being in the house without screens or noise might be aspirational particularly if the house is very busy. Perhaps try getting up earlier than the others so you have your few minutes of silence before the house wakes.
Driving whilst concentrating on your breath or on the surrounding scenery can be helpful.
Allowing quiet time every day can lead to feeling calmer and more in control of thoughts.
Learning how to deep breathe can help. Meditation also offers an opportunity to switch off from all the stresses and strains that we put our minds under.
Set yourself the goal of taking some minutes every day to be with your thoughts, to sit and breathe and be calm. You’ll be glad that you did.
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