Comparisons Never Work

The Comparison Trap: Why Comparisons Never Work and How to Break Free

It’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others. Whether scrolling through social media or watching people around us, comparisons can easily and quickly pop into our minds and leave us feeling inadequate and unhappy.

Comparing ourselves to anyone doesn’t work. It’s unfair and inaccurate because others don’t live our lives and have our experiences, thoughts, gifts or challenges. Others aren’t us – I am not you.

STOP comparing yourself to anyone. The ‘Comparison Trap’ undermines self-esteem, fuels anxiety, and distracts us from our lives and goals. When we compare ourselves to others, we highlight our perceived shortcomings and focus only on what we think we lack, diminishing our self-worth and preventing us from appreciating our unique strengths and talents.

The pressure to measure up to others’ achievements or lifestyles creates dissatisfaction and stress. That anxiety can become overwhelming, especially when comparing yourself to unrealistic standards like people in airbrushed photos on social media with perfectly shiny lives!

Comparisons can push us to pursue goals that don’t align with our true desires or values. Instead of following our life path, we might strive to meet external expectations, leading to deep dissatisfaction. Fortunately, there are ways to break free from the habit of comparison.

What Helps?

Recognise Your Triggers: Pay attention to when and why you compare yourself to others. Is it certain situations, environments, or people that trigger comparisons? Understanding what drives you can help you manage these triggers. 

Curate Social Media: Social media often presents an idealised version of life. Consider curating your feed to follow accounts that inspire positivity and set boundaries to protect your mental health.

Focus on Achievements: Regularly remind yourself of your accomplishments and unique qualities. Keeping a gratitude journal or celebrating small wins can help shift your focus from what you lack to what you have.

Set Personal Goals: Set goals that align with your values and track your progress, focusing on your ambitions rather than others’ milestones.

Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself. Everyone’s life is different, and it’s okay to have setbacks. Life is messy. Speak to yourself the way you would speak to a friend, and challenge negative thoughts whenever they arise.

Find Inspiration in Others: Instead of comparing yourself to others, view them as sources of inspiration. Celebrate your life and the lessons you’ve learned.

Build a Supportive Network: Surround yourself with people who encourage and uplift you. Limit exposure to negative influences that trigger comparisons, and engage with people who appreciate you for who you are.

Engage in Enjoyable Activities: Spend time doing things you love. This can boost your self-esteem and reduce the urge to compare.

Seek Professional Help: Consider speaking with a therapist to develop healthier thought patterns and learn how to be more gentle, compassionate and kinder to yourself.

Comparing yourself to others is a natural tendency, but by practising self-awareness, setting personal goals, and embracing your uniqueness, you can break free from the Comparison Trap and focus on what really matters – you.

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